Growing up, I remember the overwhelming joy of waking up Christmas morning. That full-body rush of feeling, knowing that this was about to be the Best Day Ever.
And without fail, it was.
Waking up twenty-four hours later, however, there was the post-Christmas let down. All the fun – the presents, the food, the parties – was over. What stretched in front of me was another whole year of waiting for the next December 25th.
But it doesn’t have to be that way.
Our family is resurrecting the Catholic tradition of the twelve days of Christmas. Starting on Christmas day and ending on Epiphany, these twelve days – also know as Christmastide – spread out the fun of Christmas and bring renewed focus to the purpose of the season: celebrating the birth of Christ.
If the thought of nearly two weeks of Christmas overwhelms you, you’re not alone. The first year we gave it a go I felt the same. What I discovered, though, is that it’s not more stressful.
It’s actually quite the opposite.
Instead of cramming all your plans into the weeks before Christmas, which are already full to overflowing, you have an additional twelve days to spread out your traditions and actually enjoy them. Those cookies to bake, ornaments to craft, or activities to make time for as a family? Save them for after Christmas day.
Plus, you have more time to really sink into the story of Christmas. To truly focus on the birth of Jesus through prayer, celebrating religious feasts, and reflecting on all the events leading up to and after his birth.
Are you ready to let go of the post-Christmas let-down too? Discover with me how to bring the rich tradition of Christmastide and Epiphany to your family.
Christmastide
During Christmastide we focus on two things: having fun and making time for faith traditions.
In the fun department we listen to carols, read Christmas stories, watch holiday movies (especially those back in the library after Christmas – score!), drink way too much hot cocoa, and consume every last morsel of the mountain of cookies that arrived with love from our friends and neighbors. (This doesn’t feel like Christmas overload because we wait through much of Advent to start our traditions.)
When out and about, we say, “Merry Christmas!” (or “Happy Halloween!” if you’re our two-year-old) to everyone we meet; we get some priceless looks, especially after New Years.
When it comes to faith, numerous Christmastide feast days – including the Feast of the Octave of the Nativity (January 1, a Holy Day of Obligation), Feast of St. Thomas Beckett, and Feast of St. Elizabeth Ann Seton (a wonderful American Saint to learn about), and of course the Feast of the Epiphany (the last of the 12 days) – offer ample opportunities to focus yourself and your family spiritually. (Find a full list of Christmastide Feasts at the bottom of this post.)
I also like to find quiet within these twelve days to rest, pray and spend time filling my cup for the coming year. While I’m not a new years resolution kind of gal, I find that the mindfulness that comes with celebrating Christmastide lends itself to starting the New Year with a sense of peace, purpose and calm.
The Feast of the Epiphany
The last of the twelve days is the Feast of the Epiphany, which celebrates the gifts of the Magi to baby Jesus and their recognition of him as the Son of God. It is celebrated on January 6 in the old Church calendar (Extraordinary Form), or the first Sunday after the start of the New Year in the post-Vatican II calendar (Ordinary Form). We keep it simple and stick to the January 6 date.
On Epiphany we take it up a notch and finish out the season with a celebration that allows us to soak in the last day of Christmas and set a spiritual tone for the coming year.
Here are the things we do to make Epiphany a meaningful, fun and prayerful day.
- Complete the nativity scene: As soon as the sun is up, our kids rush to add the three kings to our nativity set.
- Read a story: We read The Third Gift, by Linda Sue Park. This is a beautiful story – both in word and in pictures – about the gift of myrrh for the baby Jesus. It follows a father and son as they gather the ‘tears’ of tree sap that will become the third gift of the Magi.
- Exchange gifts: To further remind us of the Magi’s gifts, the kids exchange small presents. An easy way to start this tradition is to have each child save one gift from under the tree to open on Epiphany.
The first year we tried this, our kids saved gifts that they had bought for each other for Christmas (we’d given them $10 each to shop at the store for their sibling.) This year – by virtue of Covid – we did not go to the store (much to the chagrin of my kids). I instead encouraged them to make gifts for each other.
While this was more work for me, it got them thinking about each other in a meaningful way. Gifts included homemade bookmarks, slingshots, and felt hair clips. It’s amazing how these gifts reflect the personalities of each of our kids: the bookworm, the lone ranger, the lover of all things dress-up. This is a tradition that we’ll stick with. Thank you Covid.
- Enjoy something sweet: We have dessert (which is not an everyday sort of thing in our family). The kids spend the rest of the day campaigning for more sweets…and are often successful. I’m a softie on holidays.
- Bless the house by chalking the door: Most importantly, we chalk the door and perform an Epiphany house blessing. Don’t know what that is? It’s OK, I didn’t either. I’ve since discovered it’s a centuries-old tradition – though not often practiced in the United States.
We all go to the front door and my husband – traditionally it is the most senior member of the household – reads a blessing (print this one from the blog Family in Feast and Feria – simply change the year to your current one).
Then, using blessed chalk (you can have your priest bless your chalk, or bless it yourself with holy water), he marks 20 + C + M + B + 21 on the lintel above all the exterior doors of our house (you can do this inside or outside). The numbers at the beginning and end, 20 and 21, represent the year (2021), and C + M + B are the initials of the Magi — Caspar, Malchior, and Balthazar. In addition, these initials abbreviate the Latin Christus mansionem benedicat: “May Christ bless the house.”
We then walk around the house as he blesses it with holy water, the rest of us singing “We Three Kings.”
I love how this tradition helps us start the new year focused on Christ. The marks on our doors remind us – and all who see the inscription – that we strive to make this a house where our faith is lived every day.
One of the best parts of Epiphany is when the kids wake up and bounce up and down as they squeal “It’s Epiphany!!”
So…I think it’s safe to say we’ve gotten past the Christmas let-down.
Feasts During Christmastide
December 25th – The Nativity of our Lord
December 26th – Feast of St. Stephen, Deacon and First Martyr
December 27th – Feast of the St. John the Evangelist
December 28th – Feast of the Holy Innocents
December 29th – Feast of St. Thomas Becket, Archbishop and Martyr
December 30th – Feast of the Holy Family
December 31st – Feast of St. Sylvester I, Pope
January 1st – The Octave of the Nativity of our Lord, Holy Day of Obligation (Extraordinary Form); Feast of the Solemnity of Mary, Holy Day of Obligation (Ordinary Form)
January 2nd – Feast of Saints Basil the Great and Gregory Nazianzen, Bishops and Doctors of the Church
January 3rd – Feast of the Holy Name of Jesus
January 4th – Feast of St. Elizabeth Ann Seton
January 5th – Feast of St. John Neumann
January 6th – Feast of the Epiphany (12th Day of Christmas)
